Trauma is personal. It does not disappear if it is not validated. When it is ignored or invalidated the silent screams continue internally heard only by the one held captive.

          Maybe there have been times ..... when you've become unexpectedly irritable, quick to anger, aggressive, or moody.

                       Or maybe there are phases when concentrating on a task at hand becomes difficult, feeling on edge or having feelings of anxiety. 

Traumatized people chronically feel unsafe inside their bodies: The past is alive in the form of gnawing interior discomfort. Their bodies are constantly bombarded by visceral warning signs, and, in an attempt to control these processes, they often become expert at ignoring their gut feelings and in numbing awareness of what is played out inside. They learn to hide from their selves.

             Maybe you've experienced a series of bodily symptoms including fainting, dissociation, flashbacks, vertigo, chronic fatigue, or fibromyalgia ... or painful constrictions in your throat, trembling and tears and tears, or other intense emotions leaving you feeling humiliated and often judged.

             Maybe, you're feeling isolated, alone and lonely, or disconnected from your surroundings and often avoid people, difficult to trust them ....

The mind replays what the heart can’t delete.


     You might not recognise those symptoms I described because the effects of trauma differ from person to person. 

       Most likely you have a good idea what trauma feels like for you. However, you might not understand completely what causes your symptoms, or how to heal from them. 

       It is my intention to help you recognise patterns of sensations, feelings, and thoughts that arise when you are triggered or overwhelmed and provide you with tools you need to aid your healing.

One of the hardest things you may need to learn is:
You are worth unconditional love
and recovery!

“Trauma is perhaps the most avoided, ignored, belittled, denied, misunderstood, and untreated cause of human suffering.” ~ Peter Levine

Trauma doesn't disappear when you ignore it

“Trauma is hell on earth. 
Trauma resolved is a gift from the gods.” 
                                ~ Peter A. Levine

Have you ever felt like slipping into a never-ending fog, engulfing you in a haze of sadness and hopelessness. It's like being trapped in a dark pit, where every step forward feels like a herculean effort ... draining your energy, robbing you of joy, and makes even the simplest tasks seem overwhelming?

Recovery from sexual trauma is a unique journey, a unique path that requires care, compassion, and a personalized approach. I believe in creating a safe and nurturing space where you as an individual can explore your emotions, release trauma, and rediscover your inner strength. My heartfelt desire is to assist you in reclaiming your power, rebuilding trust, and finding peace in your body and mind.
 Through various comprehensive resources and guidance, I aim to provide you with a roadmap that addresses all aspects of healing. I offer educational materials, online classes, and workshops where you can gain knowledge about the effects of trauma and learn healthy coping mechanisms.  

My hope is for you to experience a transformation that transcends the pain of the past and embraces the potential for a brighter future. I envision a world where survivors of sexual trauma not only heal but thrive, where they can reclaim their identities and create a life filled with joy, resilience, and fulfillment.
 I invite you on this journey of hope, healing, and empowerment, and let me guide you towards a renewed sense of self and a life filled with infinite possibilities. Together, we can embrace the beauty of resilience and rediscover the strength within.  Seeking therapy is not a sign of weakness. It takes emotional strength to open up about your struggles. Healing from trauma takes courage!
Yes, I too have lived through some agonizing and debilitating times and lessons.

              As a four year old I experienced sexual abuse from a male family friend, plus regular inappropriate sexual touch from my aunt.

               Growing up into my teenage years and young adult, I found it impossible to allow myself to open up into intimacy and experience pleasure. It felt safer to stay in a zone of perceived control. I was raised to not say 'No!', that was deemed to be impolite and improper behaviour. 

           I was raised to not give voice to what I desired or what I was afraid of. I wound up in relationships with men who were emotionally and otherwise unavailable to me (that started with my own father who was virtually physically absent, and certainly not emotionally available).  

           I became a loner who wore the mask of an extrovert very well. Those who proclaimed to love me, I ran from ... how could I trust them or not being emotionally played with, teasing me with something I wanted dearly and then get it taken from me. 

         I craved for love, genuine heartfelt affections, and intimacy, but did not understand what that was and where to find it. I had major trust and boundaries issues except with animals and pets. 

                   In my early twenties I became a captive hostage by an Indonesian man in the Netherlands who repeatedly raped me and threatened to kill me. When I managed to escape to the UK, three months pregnant form the rapes and sexual abuse, he threatened to kill me and the baby. 
              My parents resorted to getting me protected by Interpol. I lived in abject terror of somehow being found by him, and could not face getting anywhere near the Dutch border. 
               Following that traumatic experience, I wound up in a sexless and emotionally unavailable marriage, often crying myself asleep for lack of even the smallest bit of emotional and physical affection.  I felt like existing in a silent tomb, nobody knew of the hidden agony I went through. After the marriage ended, I craved for powerful protectors to lean on, who again abused me emotionally and sexually.

                   Suffering in silence became normal, who would understand, after all I seemed such a happy and OK person behind the façade of my clearly up-beat, bubbly, fun and outgoing personality ... The shame of being blamed of having not had the courage to say no and fight off my abuser ... surely it was my fault that it happened ... surely I should have seen it coming ... but then there was the fear, the intimidation, the threats, I stayed frozen, battling with depression and helplessness ... Again and again I  wanted to put all those events behind me and move on.

           But there is hope ... and you're not alone!